Can You Say Double Standard?

For years, men having been writing all about sex and degrading women. I literally Googled “Degrading songs about women ” and this link popped up:

https://www.bustle.com/articles/137558-12-songs-that-are-actually-full-of-super-misogynistic-lyrics

For years, music has been talking about sex, getting into the mood, and many other ways of “doing it”. This linked popped up when I typed in “Songs about Oral Sex”:

https://www.menshealth.com/sex-women/g25313048/songs-about-oral-sex/

And this was found in Mens Health magazine… OK??

So my question here is, this isn’t anything new. What is the big deal about Cardi B and her song, “WAP”? There have been so many songs way before her about sex and oral sex. Also her music video, is not even as bad as others. Does anyone remember “Blurred Lines”? Those women were literally naked in that video.

What I’m trying to get at here is this: IT IS NOT A BIG DEAL. If Ja Rule, Kayne, Frank Ocean, name any other R&B artist, or even pop or rock artist, made a song about BAD (You can figure out that acronym), no one would blink an eye. But because a woman does it, she’s disgusting and perverted.

This is 2020, where the world is burning down and we are in an uproar about a song. Let’s get a grip people, it’s not a big deal.

And if you still don’t believe me, Google “Top Songs about Sex”.

Save Our Stages

Hi, it’s me again. Look, I’m not trying to be the wet blanket, I just want everyone to know, this is getting really, really bad. Like really bad for the events world.

So I’m going to say what everyone is going to roll their eyes at.

Let’s stay positive or at least let’s try to. So what’s next? What can we do to #saveourstages and #saveliveevents in general? What can you do?

Well first thing is first. Start talking about it. I haven’t been on tour since March, and this is normally my busy concert/festival season. That should be the number one red flag for concert goers everywhere. Start talking about 10 to 12 million people are still out of work. Yes, that’s only 3% of the the U.S. population, but think about the rest of the world. The percentage goes up quickly.

Secondly, you may think it doesn’t apply to you, but it does. Sure, you may not go to concerts, but have you been to a comedy or Broadway show? If we don’t do something, those smaller theaters and venues may not exist. They relay on smaller events to continuously bring revenue in.

Thirdly, even if you think that we are on the right path or if you think there is a vaccination coming out soon. Sure, that may be true. However, I talked to a good friend who is a production manager for a A-list artist. His touring schedule, doesn’t start until September 2021. Literally a year away. Let that sink in a bit.

Even if the rest of the world finally gets back to normal, we still will not be. Because of large gatherings and close proximity of people.

If you seriously want to help, here’s how:

  1. Start talking about it. Let’s get this conversation to go viral and help this industry out.
  2. Donate. To your favorite organizations, bands, venues doesn’t matter, every penny counts.
  3. Reach out to your local, state and federal representatives. If there is something you have that’s free, it’s your voice. Speak up.

I know myself and all my colleagues have worked too hard for this industry to go down like the Titantic. Let’s #SaveOurStages and help for those #WeMakeEvents

https://www.cnbc.com/video/2020/08/25/live-event-industry-went-to-zero-income-in-march-and-will-remain-at-zero-until-next-year-bandit-lites-founder.html?fbclid=IwAR2PdmgdTcj5iIQCLR4FbLMMxoN0xys9qtjlKkRQBbwGkoMFxV1pM_wh8pQ

We Are Not Coasting

An acquaintance (who works in the events world) who I know through coworkers and such was lucky enough to work for her mom’s company during this tough time. So when she asked me what I was doing with my time her response was, “Oh, so I guess you’re just coasting.”

First off, that is one of the most insensitive things you could ever say to someone during this pandemic. I know I can be harsh and blunt, but I’m not about hurting anyone’s feelings. Especially when the entire events and entertainment world is at a standstill. And millions of people are still out of work because of the pandemic.

Secondly, if you are that person that thinks that people like us should just “get another job” because we are “coasting”. Let me put it into perspective for you.

I have been working in the events world for the last 10 years. I’ve dedicated my life and made a lot of personal sacrifices to get to where I am today. 10 years may not seem like a lot, but that is 1/3 of my life. Essentially, my entire 20s has been dedicated to putting on events. So to tell someone like me or anyone else who works in this industry to get another job, just know that is a big slap in the face to us.

Also, I don’t know what happened to being kind to people, but a lot of us are mentally struggling. We are still trying to wrap our minds around the fact that our livelihood and our careers are done. How do I know this, just look at your social media pages. It’s devasting.

I recently saw a friend, and not only did he lose his touring job. But he was diagnosed with a rare skin disease and filed for bankruptcy. So please tell me he’s coasting. Because to me, it sounds like he’s just trying to survive.

I would also like to point out, that any show/movie you are watching during this pandemic. Those people are out of work as well. So forget about the new season of whatever show you are watching in this current moment in time.

Look, I’m not trying to be mean or shame people who work normal jobs or are lucky enough to find work. I just want people to understand. The entertainment/events world is struggling. Hard.

Most of us are not getting financial support. And if we are, it’s because we actually work for an artist/actor/production company, that is lucky enough to pay their staff. That’s like hitting the lottery right now. But I would say the majority of them can’t pay their staff. With no events, means no money coming in. And I wouldn’t be surprised if a lot of companies went under. It’s the sad truth.

Also, I have a lot of friends who have started their own small businesses just to pay their bills. So if you see an old band shirt on Poshmark©, please buy the shirt from them, it might mean they have water next month.

But it’s not just the people working. It’s the local venues. It’s the small artists that have been trying to get on stage for the past 10 years. It’s the people who work at big and small venues. It’s the people who produce your favorite TV show. It’s any sporting event you can think of. I could go on and on about how many people this affects. If the entertainment world doesn’t come back like it was before, just know the economy will struggle. You can kiss the Super Bowl goodbye as well.

From the bottom of my heart, if you know someone that works in the entertainment/events world, be kind to them. Literally, ask them how they are doing. While some people may be getting back on their feet, others are trying to figure out how to pay the bills.

Are Concerts Too Soon?

With the music and entertainment world at a halt, the big question is when the next big show will be? The answer is we don’t know.

And if you have been hiding around a rock because the media is driving you nuts, you probably don’t know there have been a couple of concerts that have recently happened.

Two country artists this past weekend did have a concert. One was about a 4,000 person concert and the other about 2,000.

One artist posted very publicly on Instagram about how rowdy the show was. No social distancing and no one in the video was wearing a mask. Needless to say, it had a lot of backlash on the subject. And for good reason, because as one person posted in the comments,( This is paraphrased because I couldn’t find it in the sea of comments) what about the rest of the industry? What standard are you setting? Don’t you think it will set us back?

After having several conversations with people about it, yes a lot of people are pissed. A lot. The recklessness and how everyone else is being put in the risk of COVID-19 with no proper restrictions. People in the industry are pissed.

And as much as I want to go back to work, I have a feeling it is too soon for concerts to go back to normal. So until we figure out a way, concerts won’t be happening for a while.

 

 

What Next?

As we approach the phases of getting back to “normal”. We still don’t know what normal will be. We also don’t know what it means for live events and concerts.

So where do we go from here? A lot of people have been wondering that and quite frankly, so have I.

I know there are a lot of artists going rogue on the streaming and social media. That’s great! Keep the music alive! I know drive-in concerts are now becoming a thing. I know there are a couple of different streaming platforms that are happening and are in the works.

Will this become the new normal? The way we experience events becomes this social distancing and separating of people?

To tell you the truth, I’ve been reading a lot about what others in the industry think. And I have to agree with a lot of them. Regardless of how the events world is going to change, it’s never going to be the same as a live show with a cheering crowd.

There I said it. Eventually, can we get there? I’m hopeful, but enjoying a loud, noisy concert with the crowd singing at the top of their lungs will never be the same.

“Times Like These”

It is day… I can’t even remember at this point. I feel like Tom Hanks in Cast Away. Time is just going and going… and going and going and going.

I think we are all going nuts. Believe me, I’m going stir crazy, but just know, that you are safe and you are going to get through this. Let me repeat that, you are safe and you will get through this.

I have to tell myself that every day, it’s hard to be positive during this time but you need to do it. It’s hard to keep people positive and uplifted as well. But I get it, sometimes it’s just really, really, hard.

I have several friends who have posted about their struggles and it’s difficult to know that so many people are having a strenuous time. And there isn’t much I can do about it. It’s a crappy feeling to know that people are hurting.

So now what? It’s getting close to most states to reopening. So what does that mean for entertainment? Unfortunately, we really don’t know. I don’t know and I’m not going to try to guess what is going to happen for sports and entertainment. I may not tour for the rest of the year, or maybe I could be back to work by summer. I highly doubt it, but who knows.

But for those of you, who are in the same position as me. I hope you are working around your house, hanging with your family, and working to keep moving forward with your life.

 

Keep Fighting My Friends

Friends,

I say this with a heavy heart. I’m so sorry about everything that is going on in the world right now. There’s no other way to put it besides the fact that this really sucks.

My industry, in particular, is struggling. We don’t even know if we will be able to work this year. There are hopes for it, but most of us aren’t sure. This is a nightmare and a very just stressful time for everyone. Anyone that has an hourly job, works in hospitality. It’s just nerve-racking not knowing when most of us will be going back to work.

But I can say for a lot of people in my life personally, we are strong, we are resilient, and we will fight back. Hopefully, come back stronger than before.

For my readers: Keep your head up, keep doing whatever you are doing that will get you through this. This is not easy for anyone. Believe me, I have my days. Some days, I’m great and happy as a clam. Some days like today, it was really hard to get out of bed. It was hard to get my energy and spirit up. As I write this, I just want to go back to bed. 

For everyone: Fight the negative feelings. Be grateful that you have a roof over your head and you have clean water to drink. Be grateful that you are alive. We in America literally have all the resources to protect ourselves. There are countries that will be wiped out from this virus.

Don’t forget that everyone is going through this, and we just have to get through this. Together. There is end in sight. There is hope.

Stay safe and please stay at home.

I know I’ve posted this song before, but I think more people to hear this more than ever.

Stay Strong My Friends

Friends,

I say from the bottom of my heart. I am so sorry.

For everyone. And what everyone is going through.

In entertainment, hospitality and anything and everything having to do with people or customer service. It really does hit us the hardest. But let’s not forget about the medical field and everyone else trying to do their normal everyday jobs. And to those who are saving lives, thank you. Everyone everywhere is just wondering what just happened to the world. We need to respect everyone’s’ life.

This is a difficult time for a lot of us. Some of us will not get unemployment. Some of us will really struggle to pay the bills. Some of us will just be extremely lost because we’ve never felt this ever before in our lives.

Take it from someone who has hit rock bottom several times, you will be OK. This is very hard to hear for a lot of people, but you will. I promise. You’ll understand why when you recover.

How do I know? Once you’ve hit rock bottom, a couple or so times, you learn how to get back up.  It seems impossible. But the people who fight will know exactly what I’m talking about.

I believe in our industry and the people who work in it. There’s a reason why we got into it in the first place. There’s a reason why we stick around. We are a community of outsider thinkers and big believers.

Do I know exactly what to do during this difficult time? Absolutely not. Everyone grieves differently. Everyone has a little slightly different way of thinking about life and living life.

What do I think you should do with your abnormal, large amount of time? Reflect on what means the most to you. Your career, family, friends, hobbies. What makes you get up in the morning? What makes you continue to grow and learn from your previous experiences? What gives you some sort of purpose?

I’ve known for a while but one purpose of mine is saving animals. I always have, but now I will make it more of a priority to volunteer with animals. Because animals have saved my life in the past, now it’s my time to help them and save them.

During this time, I hope you find purpose. Peace. Closure. I hope you spend more time with your close family and friends or at least give them a call. I hope you get a better understanding of our world and the world we are living in.

During this time, I hope you find new excitement in the world, something else to look forward to besides work. I hope you forgive those that have hurt you in the past. I hope you find new excitement in your partner or find a new partner. A new hobby perhaps. Something that drives you and a new passion to help you grow into the person you should be and can be. That I know you can be.

But I hope this rattles your world, to the point where you change for the better. Not just for you, but everyone around you.  We can do this, I know we can. Just believe in yourself and the community that surrounds you. We can fight this.

 

That Time Of Year

It’s that time of year. Christmas music flowing, my bank account is not glowing. It’s extremely dead unless you work Christmas parties/events/parades.

So it’s the time of year, where you reflect on what you want for next year and what you can improve on from the previous year.

But I hope that no matter where you are in life or what you are doing in life, that you have goals and ambitions for next year. To the be best the version of yourself.

This next year, I hope to write a lot more. I hope to travel a lot more. I hope to be a better person for my communities and I hope I can help more people this next year.

Nobody is perfect in this world, but at least we can work to be the best person we can be.

This is not a post about “counting your blessings”, I hope you get your butt to work and do the things you want to do next year!

 

Something Christmasy!

 

Start Sharing

There are a lot of singer/songwriters in Nashville. Let me rephrase that,

THERE ARE THOUSANDS OF SINGER/SONGWRITERS IN NASHVILLE.

It takes a lot of work, networking, but sometimes just luck to get to where you want to go as a singer/songwriter. Breaking in is half the battle. The other half is writing a song that “catches”. Whatever that means, I just know, it’s freakishly hard.

The one thing I do admire my friends for is how they spell their life into their songs. I for one, think it’s one of the most vulnerable things you could do. Admitting your doubts, fears, accomplishments, heartbreaks and much more to the world. Most people it takes months to say I love you to their partner.

I actually used to write a lot, when I was younger. Writing songs helped me focus my energy and understanding my feelings a little bit deeper.

I strongly suggest to those who have any sort of strong passion to put it down on paper. you would be amazed at what comes out.